she calls me after midnight to give me a pep talk. she tells me that i've never let her down, that i was a good husband and always a good provider. she tells me that it was never about me, it was about her and i had no control in it. the irony of it, almost five years after the fact. how am i supposed to respond? she tells me that her boyfriend has the utmost respect of me. how am i supposed to respond to that? is this some kind of weird closure? she tells me that it is up to me to get up and go, that i've not lost anything. if anything, it has just been dormant. what the hell?
it seems trite but it is appropriate:
"Up, down, turn around; please don't let me hit the ground Tonight I think I'll walk alone; find my soul as I go home
Oh it's the last time, oh it's the last time
Each way I turn I know I'll always try To break the circle That has been placed round me..." --Moby