Friday, December 09, 2005

buddhist nun ringing bell


buddhist nun ringing bell
Originally uploaded by equusignis.
she calls me after midnight to give me a pep talk. she tells me that i've never let her down, that i was a good husband and always a good provider. she tells me that it was never about me, it was about her and i had no control in it. the irony of it, almost five years after the fact. how am i supposed to respond? she tells me that her boyfriend has the utmost respect of me. how am i supposed to respond to that? is this some kind of weird closure? she tells me that it is up to me to get up and go, that i've not lost anything. if anything, it has just been dormant. what the hell?

it seems trite but it is appropriate:

"Up, down, turn around; please don't let me hit the ground
Tonight I think I'll walk alone; find my soul as I go home

Oh it's the last time, oh it's the last time

Each way I turn
I know I'll always try
To break the circle
That has been placed round me..."
--Moby

3 comments:

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BeckyBumbleFuck said...

I read this awhile back and couldn't think of what to say, especially because New Order started blaring through my mind.

I hope you're doing OK...
That conversation sounded surreal, at minimum.

BeckyBumbleFuck said...

Happy Valentine's Day!
XOXO