LET us go then, you and I,
When the evening is spread out against the sky
Like a patient etherised upon a table;
Let us go, through certain half-deserted streets,
The muttering retreats
Of restless nights in one-night cheap hotels
And sawdust restaurants with oyster-shells:
Streets that follow like a tedious argument
Of insidious intent
To lead you to an overwhelming question …
Oh, do not ask, “What is it?”
Let us go and make our visit.
--T.S. Eliot from The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock
so let us go and make our visit. make a visit into the fabric of today to find what can be brought forth. what tales, discoveries, and secrets lie within the yarn? how many unknowns are there and should they be kept track of?
so my brain started to try and talk to me. dredging up all these complicated to do lists, things to be apprehensive about, people to avoid, people to contact and so on. i looked for the standby switch. it didn't work. i looked for the off switch. it had been removed.
i was left to deal with the reality of the situation. so i let it have its say, acutely listening, contemplated the message, its intent and pondered its true nature and then let it go. they say the mind has unlimited capacity to asorb and learn and its potential memory is limitless. i am making it a point to reserve enough space to remember how to learn a lesson on how to do something. i think that is where i usually lose it. if it is a how to then it is not so tough but a how to on a how to can start to get tricky. i always have had the suspicion that i have difficulty thinking linearly. just can't think in a straight line. maybe that is why i sucked in math. hmmm...
or maybe it was because when i was a child in school i used to get my hand rapped with a ruler by the mean french teacher whenever i finished my math problem quickly and then flipped the chalk slate over and started drawing airplanes. i probably looked like i was never doing the math problems. belated clarity?!
possible, but unlikely.